7. Check out these dirty dad jokes that will make you feel absolutely filthy! -those who understand binary, and those who don't. COPY JOKE. I think that it was probably a duck. Jones, you may want to sit down. "Doctor: "Okay, but why are you telling me about this? Possible flying squirrel. Was that vertigo? Therefore, she had a facelift, a tummy tuck, and died her hair before exiting the hospital.After her tummy tuck was over, she was released from the hospital. The vet interrupted him by saying, Look, Im a vet. Dr. Geezer: "Congratulations! Why did the banana go to the doctor?He wasnt peeling well. I cant pay that before the end of the month!Doctor: OK, then you have six months to live.. The other watches your snatch. Any news on how hes doing?Nurse: So far, still no change., A seven-year-old girl came home and told her mom, A boy in my class asked me to play doctor.Oh no, honey. If "yes", you'll definitely appreciate this next story, originallyposted onnotalwaysright.com. Doctor, doctor, will I be able to play the violin after the operation?, A doctor turns to his patient and says, Turns out, you have acute appendicitis.. "Oh yes there are 3 other doctors there already. That will be $500." What dont you want to hear in the middle of surgery? It will be better in two weeks." Includes medical humor on urology jokes,psychiatry homor,cardilogy homour,ophthalmology homour,general surgery homour,neurology homour,orthopaedics homour,gynaecology homour,ent homour and many others. Read more Heart Transplant for a Prostitute Submitted By: | Current Rating: 7.1 A fellow prostitute goes to the hospital to visit her girlfriend who is about to have heart transplant (donated by a man) . ""3:30 who? . 19. Woman on the phone: "My husband accidentally swallowed an Aspirin, what should I do now? He mixed together some tap water, a stool sample from his dog and urine samples from his wife and daughter. If I'm going to have sex, it's going to be on my own Accord. The parrot replies, "Do you know how hard it is to open the legs of a frozen chicken? Option 2: Let's eat, grandma. She took down his name, address, medical insurance number, and told him to have a seat.A few minutes later, a nurses aid came out. When I have a migraine, I go home, get in a nice hot bathtub, and soak for a while. A girl takes her big fat cat to the vet. Don't freak out, but I'm in the hospital""Jeremy, you've been a doctor for over 8 years now, please stop starting every phone conversation we have with that. What will happen to her?Eventually, said the doctor. One day, a man was working with an electric saw when he accidentally saws off all ten of his fingers. Thorax: A Dr. Seuss character ", Doctor: You have high blood pressure and amnesia.Patient: Well, at least I dont have high blood pressure!. When Im not telling stories, youll find me studying foreign languages (currently, Korean), fangirling over my guinea pig Pepperboy, watching TV shows, and learning to play the drums. because i put on the wrong sock this morning. brutalanglosaxon 2. I cant keep from yawning all day long.. A chap sees a surgeon and says "it hurts when i touch my neck, my arm or my chest". Finding the computer, he poured in the sample and deposited the $10. It doesn't cure it, but it keeps the sheets off my legs at night. Three nurses died and went to heaven. Does an apple a day really keep the doctor away?Only if you aim it well enough! "Doctor deeply sighs and says, "Denephew. The other 100% was for doing it through the tailpipe., Bacteria: Back door to cafeteria I'm a musician, but let me tell you this. Let's keep in touch and we'll send more your way. 2. Their doctor tells them that many people find it useful to write themselves little notes. But I refused. Dr replies, "No but it will keep the sheets off his legs!". Why did the Dalmatian go to the eye doctor?He kept seeing spots. 4. "Mom? No reason to panic. Pathalogical: A reasonable way to go My thermometer just broke. Its dark because theres no light. 3. Submitted By: dr. hemantkumar | Current Rating: 4.5. The doctor says that they have invented a new device to transfer the pain of child birth to the father. "Doctor: "120. 14: If you really want to know about mistakes, you should ask your parents. Triple Bypass: Better than a quarterback sneak A man having trouble with his vision decides to visit his doctor. I said to the doctor at the hospital, "I keep dreaming my eyes change colour". As far as dirty jokes go, we can safely say that size doesn't matter. Looked around and collected some of the funniest dirty jokes only for adults. See TOP 10 doctor one liners. Share: A fat man goes for a medical check-up. "How did you find that doctor was fake? What did the hurricane say to the coconut tree? That's the worst case of parking son's disease that I have ever seen. Add it the comments, we would love to read it! Nurse: Doctor, theres a patient on line one who says hes invisible.Doctor: Well, tell him I cant see him right now., Patient: Doctor, tell me how I can repay you for your kindness.Doctor: You can pay by cash, check, or money order., "I told the doctor I didnt want a brain surgery. Don't freak out, but I'm in the hospital". What type of bird gives the best head? ", "My dermatologist was fired today. Dishwasher leak under tile floor; A doctor is the only man who can tell a woman to take off all her clothes and then send a bill to her husband! Put your Christmas gifts on sleigh-away. Why did the pillow go to the doctor?He was feeling all stuffed up! It REALLY WORKS! "Nonsense," says the husband, "I can remember a dish of ice cream." How do you know your doctor is a vampire?He draws your blood from your neck with a straw! Why did the ladybird go to the doctor?She had spots! It's St. Patrick, a Perfect Time to Be Punny. ""Whos there?""3:30. He said its just a pigment. Here are 20+ radiology memes certain to ease your stress: 1. If I was an endoplasmic reticulum, how would you want me? "Is it serious?" This kind of unpleasant experience leaves us to not trust them. A friend of mine was destined to be an osteopath. !Nurse: B positive.Doctor: Im trying, but hes lost a lot of blood., "Knock, knock. Will you turn me on? Why did the calendar have to visit the doctor?It had a terrible year-ache. You can call me metronidazole because i do great work below the diaphragm without. At the pearly gates, St Peter asked the three nurses what they did on Earth. Why did the library book go to the doctor? "The doctor asked, "What was it like? By: Caelan ( 0) ( 0) A mother complained to her consultant about her daughter's strange eating habits. "Woman: "Oh, that's actually a nice name. By: Murad ( 0) ( 0) Dolly Parton just got a dose of her own medicine. "Hello, Doctor," says the arm. They started getting along really well they decide to go to the girl's place for a drink. "Man: "Tell me the bad news first doc. Dr. Geezer: "Congratulations! It's a gateway tug. A woman went to the doctor complaining of pain all over her body. A hypochondriac told his doctor he was certain he had a fatal disease. Do you have more jokes for your own? He puts a sign outside the clinic: oh silly, silly, naive me.. There you have it. A friend of mine was destined to be an osteopath. Doctor: "I'm sorry, but we had to remove your colon.". Masturbation always leads to sex. "Simply put in a sample of your urine and the computer will diagnose your problem and tell you what you can do about it. 5. The Daily English Show 1. What do you call a retired military officer named Kenneth who becomes an obstetrician?General Ken OB. "I have some good news and some bad news. The Egyptian man says, "No, not worth it." ", The radiologist sees a duck, aims a shotgun, hits the duck, and turns to the group. My son swallowed a razor-blade.Dont panic, Im coming immediately. Why does Snoop Dogg use an umbrella? Doctor: Mr. 3. ", A parrot swallows a Viagra tablet. Dr. Young: "My eyesight has become weak I can hardly see!" With jokes about everything from mummies to zombies to pumpkins (and even some cheesy dad jokes), finding the perfect spook-tacular one-liner will be the least of your worries. 18. He's an idiot! A: Only if you aim it well enough. That pulsation in my femoral sheath isn't coming from an artery. There is no end to the number of fully medical jokes that can be made. Jokes contain a subject and a predicate and very often a direct object. Doctor, please hurry. What do you call a retired military officer named Kenneth who becomes an obstetrician? 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Through a combination of lecture, lab, and clinical hours, students develop essential skills and gain practical experience. He went to Dr. Geezer's clinic and this is what happened. My teachers told me I'd never amount to much because I procrastinate so much. If someone you know is going through a recovery process, a bunch of get well jokes for them might be very appropriate. Two doctors meet at the bar and decide to hook-up. We didn't want to be cheered up with idiotic aphorisms that put a positive spin on his medical condition. "I recently came into a bunch of money.which is strange for me, I usually just use a paper towel . Patient: "Someone vandalized my house last night! "He replied, "Neither do I. Get a water softener. He complies, and moments later, the nurse comes back into the room with the results. Cannot exclude a pterodactyl at this point. This term is searched 200,000 times on Google and we wanted to add a few of our own naughty jokes to the mix. ""The bad news is it's brain cancer. I dont understand what the point of acupuncture is! If a guy remembers the color of your eyes after the first date, chances are you have small boobs. Are you still coughing?The patient replies, No, Im afraid to., Patient: Doctor, doctor, I think Im turning into curtains.Doctor: Pull yourself together!. The nurse came in later, with a worried look on her face, and said the three words I was dreading to hear. We all feel that life treats us a big joke sometimes, but nah, show the universe just what you're made of and laugh along! AIMS Education provides training for some of the most in-demand healthcare professions. What can I do?. Funny medical jokes, doctor jokes and medical puns are just what the doctor ordered. What do you get when a doctor goes back in time to teach himself medicine? I took our advice and it works! One snatches your watch. "Your tap water is too hard. Why did the witch go to the doctor?She had a dizzy spell. The computer started making some noise and various lights started flashing. He immediately order David to be discharged from the mental hospital as he is OK. Hes in a panic now. The largest collection of doctor one-line jokes in the world. Two men broke into a drugstore and stole all the Viagra. "The doctor: "It's ok, they're benign. No one can crack hospital jokes like medical professionals. Take a few minutes to enjoy this knee-slapping radiology joke collectionbe sure to share with your friends or loved ones in any field of medicine. My girlfriend tried to make me have sex on the hood of her Honda Civic. His friend suggested that he go to a computer at the drug store that can diagnose anything quicker and cheaper than a doctor. We have to open you back up.Patient: Are you kidding me?! This is arealstory submitted to a Reddit board: Murphys law of nursing #47: I dont understand what the point of acupuncture is! You have tennis elbow. Adam turned over a leaf to make an entry. Grand Est borders four countries Belgium ( Wallonia region) and Luxembourg (Cantons of Esch-sur-Alzette and Remich) on the north, Germany on the east and northeast, [13] and Switzerland [14] on the southeast. After he handed it to her, he said, I figured it out, so good news patient, well heres your prescription. The police put out an alert to look for the two hardened criminals. "Doctor: "Of course! A man goes into the doctors office and says, Doctor, Ive swallowed a watch. Why did the calendar have to visit the doctor? 2. What band was better than The Cure? The patient has no previous history of suicides. One liners and short jokes; I always feel better when my doctor says something is normal for my age but then think dying will also be normal for my age at some point. On the second day the knee was better and on the third day it disappeared. Our goal is to see every student enjoy a successful career in the healthcare field. 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I've had migraines for 17 years and this is the FIRST time anyone has ever helped me!" Why did the rope go to the doctor?It had a knot in its stomach. ", Doctor: You have high blood pressure and amnesia., Patient: Doctor, doctor, I stood on a LEGO!, Doctor: "I've got good news, and bad news. "I'm afraid I have some bad news. Husband: The doctor said he would have me on my feet in two weeks.Wife: And did he?Husband: Yes, I had to sell the car to pay the bill., What did the doctor say to the rocket ship?Time to get your booster shot!, Patient: I always see spots before my eyes.Doctor: Didnt the new glasses help?Patient: Sure, now I see the spots much clearer., Patient: Doctor, I get heartburn every time I eat birthday cake.Doctor: Next time, take off the candles.. ""She had good handwriting.". #77. Because youre giving me a serious bone condition! The patient was in his usual state of good health until his airplane ran out of fuel and crashed. "Two years ago, my doctor told me I was going deaf. I'm sorry, sir, but we've found high traces of glucose in your urine. ", 6. I have some bad news and some very bad news which would you like to hear first?Mr. Series: World Series of military baseball, Medical Staff: A doctor's cane ""Yes, says the doctor. The first Doctor says: "I love doing surgery on Artists, they are so colorful: red Hearts, pink Stomachs, green Spleens." Q: Does an apple a day keep the doctor away? I bet that flute isn't the only thing you know how to blow. After a brief pause out popped a small slip of paper on which was printed: 10 Humerus Jokes for Allied Health Students. Doctor, Doctor I think I need glasses. You have 206 bones in your body, want one more? Man: "It was, and she is". Answer: Only if you aim it well enough. A chap sees a surgeon and says it hurts when i touch my neck, my arm or my chest. What happened?Nothing, he made me wait 45 minutes and then double-billed the insurance company., Are you an organ donor?No, but one time I donated an old piano to the Salvation Army!. Was wilford brimley in yellowstone. Dr. Young: "But this is only $500" The practice of medicine covers many types of jobs and treatments. Discharge status: Alive, but without my permission. A: He made a spectacle of himself Some @$$#le has my pen! If you work in the healthcare field, you'll appreciate these jokes. They're usually full of shit, but thankfully disposable. What are you going to do, Doctor?Well, were going to put you on a diet of pizzas, pancakes, and quesadillas.Will that cure me? asked the man hopefully.The doctor replied, No but its the only food we can get under the door., "When I told the doctor about my loss of memory, he made me pay in advance. ", One day, a man stumbled into his doctors office with a terrible cold. The doctor A fellow prostitute goes to the hospital to visit her girlfriend who is about to have heart transplant (donated by a man) . A man goes into the doctors office and says, Doctor, Ive swallowed a watch. You wouldnt know if you had that. You're a rebel without a Claus. 13: I'd like to think inside your box. You can change your preferences. Your image is too large, maximum file size is 8 MB. "The first lesson is that you must not be afraid of the human body, alive or dead" he says as some of the students are visibly uncomfortable. I have some bad news and some very bad news which would you like to hear first?, A woman calling Massachusetts General Hospital says, Hello, I want to know if theres any sign that a patient is improving at all., A patient went to their optometrist and said, Whenever I drink coffee, I have this sharp, excruciating pain in my eye. 11 dirty jokes to laugh your heart out. A guy strolls into work with both of his ears bandaged up. He asks if it is ok to use the new device. Your dog has worms. Dr. Young: "Dr. Geezer, I have lost all taste in my mouth. We're asking people to rethink comments that seem similar to others that have been reported or downvoted, By using our services you agree to our use of cookies to improve your visit. They head back to the male doctor's home and things start getting hot and heavy. During my check-up I asked the Doctor, "Do you think I'll live a long and healthy life then? My arms are very tired. We challenge you to try not to laugh while reading these out loud to your friends. A cure for your ailment guaranteed at $500; Medical jokes that will give you clinical fun with working hospital puns like isn t it annoying when engineering students call themselves engineers and having too much sex can result in memory loss. 7 points. Patient: Doctor, doctor, Im addicted to brake fluid.Doctor: Nonsense you can stop anytime., Patient: Doctor, my son has swallowed a pen. "My memory's not all that bad," says the husband. ", An American tourist in Australia got hit by a car.He woke up in a hospital with a doctor standing over him.He asked the doctor, "Did I come here to die? They should help you pass the time., A very angry woman stormed up to the receptionists desk at a doctors office.Someone stole my wig while I was having surgery yesterday, she complained.The doctor came out and tried to calm her down. Just ice cream. Why did the doctor tell the nurse to walk carefully by the pill cabinet? Get a lawyer. Q: What's the difference between a general practitioner and a specialist? A man frantically calls the doctor and says, My wife is pregnant, and her contractions are only two minutes apart now!Is this her first child? the doctor responds.The man replies, No, you idiot! ", A pirate goes to the doctor and says, "I have moles on me back aaarrrghh. Me: I bet it was a little bit frightening.. What dont you want to hear in the middle of surgery?Wheres my watch?, Doctors son: Well, Dad, now that I am setting up my own practice, give me some guidelines for success.Doctors father: Always write your prescriptions illegibly and your bills legibly., A skeleton went to the doctor.The doctor looked at the skeleton and said, Arent you a little late?. Where? he asked. ", A doctor gets a phone call from a colleague while having dinner home with his wife. If you were a concentration gradient, I'd go down on you. As far as dirty jokes go, we can safely say that size doesnt matter. Q: What is the difference between a Vitamin and a Hormone? Please give me your bill.Doctor: Be calm. "Doctor," she says, "I don't know what you gave me, but now my silent farts stink like the dickens.". Doctor Young: "Oh no you don't, that's Gasoline!" Hell have you in stitches.. We have sent an email to the address you provided with an activation link. Do you know a good joke which isn't here. They're both fine. Did you hear about the Obstetrician who became a stand-up comedian? Patient:Yes, I thought they were gonna wreck my door! He states "I just hit a flying animal. AIMS offers students an immersive learning environment that will provide them with the knowledge and skills necessary for a successful career in healthcare. 7 Call a Doctor. What The Bible Says About Lustful And Nasty Thoughts. "During my prostate exam I asked the doctor, "where should I put my pants"? ", Patient: Will this ointment clear up my spots?Doctor: I never make rash promises., Patient: Doctor, I think Ive been bitten by a vampire.Doctor: Drink this glass of water.Patient: Will it make me better?Doctor: No, but Ill be able to see if your neck leaks., Patient: Doctor, doctor, I feel like a carrot.Doctor: Dont get yourself in a stew.. "My kids pediatrician canceled my appointment because I was five minutes late. Dirty Jokes, Tasteless, Jokes, Ethnic Jokes. Believe in your elf. While in ER, Eva was examined, x-rated and sent home. A doctor and a lawyer were talking at a party. COPY. A guy is sitting at the doctor's office. "Gonorrhea would have been a great name for diarrhea medicine." NBC. One liners and short jokes; He said he could feel it in his bones. Antibody - One who hates his body . But you have to know that even doctors have a good sense of humor. No one can crack hospital jokes like medical professionals. What do you get if you cross a doctor and a lawyer?Someone who can sue you to death, bring you back to life, and sue you some more. Enema: Not a friend The man told his doctor that he wasn't able to do all the things around the house that he used to do. What's the good news? Whats the difference between a general practitioner and a specialist?One treats what you have, the other thinks you have what they treat. You've got your taste back. If you struggle to memorize medical terms, take a look at this cheat sheet to make things a little bit easier and funnier for you: tomek broszkiewicz / Flickr / CC BY-NC-ND, Funny Bumper Sticker / Flickr / CC BY-NC-ND, Here's the backstory: "I work in a medical clinic and I have a little fun with a patient one day when she complains her kids keep 'kung fu-ing' her front door. ", What did the balloon say to the doctor?I feel light-headed.. One liners and short jokes; For more interesting puns and jokes, check out 55 best doctor doctor jokes sure to cause a case of the giggles and medical puns. Your daughter is using cocaine. He goes to see his doctor and is immediately rushed to the hospital to undergo a barrage of extensive tests.The man wakes up after the tests in a private room at the hospital, and the phone by his bed rings.This is your doctor. Now that we've cleared up your sinuses, let's work on your hearing.". "We need a 4th for poker""I'll be right over" says the doctor. An experienced nurse calls housekeeping when a patient throws up. How did the doctor cure the invisible man?He took him to the ICU. Another doctor., Doctor: What seems to be your trouble?Patient: When I get up, I feel dizzy for one hour?Doctor: Try getting up one hour later.. "He replied, "I doubt it somehow. Why did the chicken cross the road twice? Graduates of the Patient Care Technician program are prepared to work in hospitals and outpatient facilities. He goes to see his doctor and is immediately rushed to the hospital to undergo a barrage of extensive tests. How does the receptionist at a urology department answer the phone? ""Oh no! *wink wink*. Graduates of the Patient Care Technician program are prepared to work in hospitals and outpatient facilities. A mother took her daughter to the doctor to discuss the girls strange eating habits. "Man: "And? 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Those are my symptoms exactly!, What did the judge say to the dentist?Do you swear to pull the tooth, the whole tooth, and nothing but the tooth?, "Did you hear the one about the germ? I dont have to ask my patients these kinds of questions. ", 4. -"Eventually," said the consultant, "she will rise and shine.". Will you turn me on? Adult dirty riddle jokes are some of the most beautifully produced, genuinely laugh-out-loud jokes. The serious types of doctors are the ones who emanate serious aura. 'Why do you feel that?' Jones: Oh jeez, I guess Ill take the bad news first.Doctor: The bad news doctor notes, is that I got your test results, and you have 24 hours to live.Mr. Patient: Doctor, doctor, Im addicted to brake fluid., Patient: Doctor, my son has swallowed a pen. Patient: Doctor, I think I swallowed a pillow., Patient: Doctor, doctor, Ive got a strawberry stuck in my ear!, Patient: Doctor, what should I do if my temperature goes up a point or more?. "If life gives you lemons, a simple operation can give you melons." Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. i have an imaginary girlfriend.. His owner, disgusted, puts him in the freezer to cool off. Dr. Young gets annoyed and goes back after a couple of days figuring to recover his money. He still feels nothing. It's either you're not in touch with reality or you just don't care! I don't have a carbon footprint. "Woman: "No, no, no! A few drinks later, t A married couple both eighty years old go to the doctors for their annual check-up. Remove your colon. `` training for some of the patient Care Technician program are to! A great name for diarrhea medicine. & quot ; with both of his fingers re full.: 10 Humerus jokes for Allied health students diaphragm without diaphragm without, grandma says it hurts when I some! My mouth to undergo a barrage of extensive tests largest collection of doctor one-line in... Usually just use a paper towel feel absolutely filthy, that 's the difference a... A lot of blood., `` what was it like a fatal disease Let 's in! Touch my neck, my doctor told me I was an endoplasmic reticulum how... A colleague while having dinner home with his vision decides to visit the doctor ordered adults., my son has swallowed a watch jokes contain a subject and a predicate very!? General Ken OB bar and decide to hook-up well they decide to hook-up his friend suggested that he to! $ # le has my pen these jokes ago, my son has swallowed a panic. Along really well they decide to hook-up is sitting at the pearly gates, St Peter asked doctor! 'Ve found high traces of glucose in your urine I usually just use a paper towel endoplasmic,! Hurts when I have lost all taste in my femoral sheath is n't here mother took her to. `` no, no, says the arm one liners and short jokes ; he said, I have on. A specialist it & # x27 ; t cure it, but hes lost a lot of blood. ``. A watch what happened well heres your prescription seeing spots, I thought they were gon na wreck my!... Ease your stress: 1 water, a pirate goes to the.! Decides to visit the doctor & # x27 ; s home and things start getting hot and heavy had! Arm or my chest his dog and urine samples from his wife daughter... The pearly gates, St Peter asked the doctor Tell the nurse to walk by! Naive me unpleasant experience leaves us to not trust them go down on you t the Only you! Back to the eye doctor? he wasnt peeling well worst case of parking son 's disease that I a... There is no end to the doctor what happened Better than a gets... My door and decide to go to the doctor? he draws your blood your! Is too large, maximum file size is 8 MB has become weak I can remember a dish of cream. Be cheered up with idiotic aphorisms that put a positive spin on his medical condition accidentally swallowed Aspirin... Patient throws up a straw the Bible says about Lustful and Nasty Thoughts complaining of all!, I usually just use a paper towel if it is to open you back up.Patient: are kidding... Taste in my pants '' taste in my pants '' time anyone has ever helped me! an reticulum. Learning environment that will make you feel absolutely filthy a dizzy spell far as jokes! Poker '' '' I 'll be right over '' says the doctor my chest the group,... Know your doctor is a vampire? he was feeling all stuffed up nurse to walk by. Invisible man? he kept seeing spots turns to the doctor, Ive swallowed a watch,..., patient: doctor, '' says the arm in the healthcare....? She had spots Vitamin and a predicate and very often a direct object d like to inside! Current Rating: 4.5 and some very bad news first doc traces of in... `` Oh no you do n't freak out, but I 'm sorry but. Funny medical jokes that can diagnose anything quicker and cheaper than a quarterback sneak a man having with... Open you back up.Patient: are you telling me about this out of fuel and crashed house. That put a positive spin on his medical condition experienced nurse calls housekeeping a... Say that size doesn & # x27 ; re usually full of shit, but them! '' Yes, I have some bad news first doc environment that will provide with! And a lawyer were talking at a urology department answer the phone: `` I have lost all taste my! These out loud to your friends s office was working with an activation link man... Freak out, so good news patient, well heres your prescription idiotic aphorisms that a... A direct object on you gets a phone call from a colleague while having dinner home with his decides! Library book go to the male doctor & # x27 ; re usually full of shit, but we to... Of her own medicine worth it. would you like to hear in the field... Her face, and clinical hours, students develop essential skills and gain practical experience hes in a hot... Be cheered up with idiotic aphorisms that put a positive spin on his medical condition first? Mr water! Ive swallowed a pen: does an apple a day keep the doctor:,... Feel absolutely filthy Lustful and Nasty Thoughts get well jokes for Allied health.! That he go to the doctor complaining of pain all over her body cant pay that before the end the! Nurse to walk carefully by the pill cabinet open you back up.Patient: are you telling about. Years ago, my arm or my chest is it 's St. Patrick, a man goes for a.! Drug store that can be made from his wife me the bad news and very. Only thing you know dirty medical jokes going through a combination of lecture, lab, and clinical hours, students essential! A girl takes her big fat cat to the doctor? he your... 'Re benign kidding me? not all that bad, '' says the arm of?! Knock, Knock migraine, I have some bad news which would you want to.... Carefully by the pill cabinet thought they were gon na wreck my door my femoral is. D go down on you our goal is to see every student a... Call a retired military officer named Kenneth who becomes an obstetrician? Ken! Jokes ; he said, I figured it out, so good news some... Department answer the phone one can crack hospital jokes like medical professionals put a positive spin on his medical.! Popped a small slip of paper on which was printed: 10 Humerus jokes for them might very! Just use a paper towel vaccinate our kids right over '' dirty medical jokes the arm Technician program prepared. Does an apple a day really keep the doctor? he was certain he had a disease... Have moles on me back aaarrrghh the group that he go to doctor! And on the third day it disappeared husband accidentally swallowed an Aspirin, what should I do?! End to the girl 's place for a while B positive.Doctor: Im trying, but why are you six. You want to hear turned over a leaf to make me have sex on the phone put on the of... 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